Parents of toddlers are often confused and frightened about the issue of discipline. This is because they haven’t understood the real meaning of discipline. The origin of discipline is from a Latin word that means ‘teaching.’ To discipline a toddler means to teach him/her the right way of doing things by distinguishing between right and wrong. It does not mean punishment or using force. It is done through love, care and understanding.
For example, if a child cries for help you need to attend to him so that he will learn that by reaching out to others he can get love and care. He will also learn to become loving and caring. On the contrary, if a crying child is not attended to, then he will learn there is no use in crying, and that he can’t get help from any one by any means. He will learn to feel helpless and unwanted. He will also learn to become a recluse and will believe that he can’t make a difference.
Hence, giving a lot of love, care and attention to your kids does not spoil them or teach them indiscipline. Instead, you are laying the foundation stones of discipline in his mind. Parents should know that they can’t teach children discipline through force or punishment, such as by smacking or scolding. Such enforced discipline will remain superficial and temporary based on fear, and the child will revolt when the right time comes. He will also learn that it is alright to scold or lash out at others who are smaller and vulnerable.
By punishment and threat, the parents are creating a sort of power struggle with the kids. The kids will try to get an upper-hand when they lose the fear of threat and punishment from the parents. But teaching them the right things through love and care will not only lay a strong foundation of discipline and self-confidence but also they will learn to trust and respect their parents and others.
The role of parents as teachers of toddlers is very important and challenging in this regard. Parents need to understand that the approach to discipline toddlers should be different from adults. This is because toddlers and even older children have immature nervous system and so have short attention spans.
That is why their attention is easily diverted and over-stimulated by external circumstances such as sights, sound, brightness and so on. These factors affect their behavior. Their emotional and physical needs also are different, but they are handicapped by an undeveloped vocabulary to express their wants. Hence, parents need to be very patient and understanding while teaching their kids discipline.
Posted on May 16th, 2008 by admin
Filed under: Baby, Behavior, Learning, Toddler
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